Wednesday, August 2, 2017

Absurd Anxious Thoughts

"An anxious mind doesn't know the difference between possible and probable." - me

Unedited anxious thoughts that I have had:

- The guy in the apartment below us is moving out because I dropped my shampoo bottle in the shower one too many times.

- That dog collar jingling sound behind me isn't a person running with their dog. It's actually a murderer using a dog collar to trick me so that he can murder me. Possibly with the dog collar.

 - That sign says "Free Water," but what if they don't really mean free? and then I look like an idiot taking a cup of water from their giant water jug. (I ended up accidentally taking 15 water cups and dropping the other 15 on the ground.)

- I just touched the crosswalk button with my finger that has a cut on it. I'm going to get herpes!

- That woman living out of her car is going to shoot her dog because I made it bark when I walked past.

- I better not walk barefoot in case any stray heroin needles are laying around.

- I silently judged that girl in my mind and she is now coming up behind us to take her telepathic revenge, push me to the ground and kick me off the cliff.